katniss everdeen (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
burnwithus) wrote2011-01-13 03:21 pm
burnwithus) wrote2011-01-13 03:21 pm
(peeta) the sea's wine red; this is the death of beauty
I hate hospitals. I spent far too much time in them in District 13, but until Gale wakes up there's nothing to do but wait. I've been sitting in this chair for hours, given a lot of time to wonder why and how everything went so wrong. Trying to figure out what he'll remember when he does wake up, or what he'll expect of me but I can't go back to being the girl that he used to know. There's a point crossed where that becomes impossible.
My back aches from sitting too long. I should stretch my legs before they fall asleep. But before I get the chance to, the door of the room opens.
It's Peeta.
Just the sight of him is enough to cause an uncomfortable twist in my stomach. Peeta, who was so willing to throw his lot in with mine despite how angry he was with me. Hospitals remind me of him, too. Of how much time I spent in them, trying not to think about what the Capitol was doing to Peeta. Images of him being beaten and electrocuted like Johanna or forced to live constantly in the nightmares that tracker jacker venom brings. I tried not to think about what the rebels were doing to undo it, as if I wasn't sure it would work. As if I should prepare myself for losing him. That's something else I haven't told him about, something I should tell him, but-
I have to swallow before looking at him, regaining composure. "Peeta...what are you doing here?" He doesn't have to be here. He knows that, probably. But he is, because that's who this Peeta used to be.
My back aches from sitting too long. I should stretch my legs before they fall asleep. But before I get the chance to, the door of the room opens.
It's Peeta.
Just the sight of him is enough to cause an uncomfortable twist in my stomach. Peeta, who was so willing to throw his lot in with mine despite how angry he was with me. Hospitals remind me of him, too. Of how much time I spent in them, trying not to think about what the Capitol was doing to Peeta. Images of him being beaten and electrocuted like Johanna or forced to live constantly in the nightmares that tracker jacker venom brings. I tried not to think about what the rebels were doing to undo it, as if I wasn't sure it would work. As if I should prepare myself for losing him. That's something else I haven't told him about, something I should tell him, but-
I have to swallow before looking at him, regaining composure. "Peeta...what are you doing here?" He doesn't have to be here. He knows that, probably. But he is, because that's who this Peeta used to be.